The Childrens (2011) Trailer/Transcript

Trailer 1

 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog (offscreen): We're trying to get the old gang back together again.
 * Children/Muppet (offscreen): We haven't done this in a long time.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog (offscreen): Your fans never left you. The world hasn't forgotten.
 * Children/Muppet (offscreen): Sure it's impossible, but we've got to try. It's time to play the music.
 * Prince Cornelius/Gary: It's time to light the lights.
 * Thumbelina/Mary: It's time to meet the Childrens.
 * [Cheers]
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: Come on guys, let's go.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear: Wow, I can't believe we're all back together.
 * Prince Cornelius/Gary: Yeah! Sorry, I'm just super excited.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: The Childrens have always been about artistic integrity, not cheap tricks.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear: Check it out-- fart shoes.
 * [Fart sounds]
 * Thumbelina/Mary: This is going to be really short movie.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Oh look, what's that over there.
 * Matilda/Miss Poogy: Oh what?
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Hi-yah!
 * Cat/Bobo: Ow, ow
 * Noah Parker/Walter: Throw me over.
 * Thumbelina/Mary: I think that's an electric fence.
 * [Screaming]
 * Thumbelina/Mary: It's an electric fence.
 * Prince Cornelius/Gary: Yup.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: Maybe you don't need the whole world to love you, you know? Maybe you just need one person.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Oh, Orinoco. Orinoco, Orinoco, Orinoco!
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: I don't care what anybody says. I believe in you-- and you.
 * McZee/Swedish Chef: Huh?
 * [Applause]
 * [Radio Playing]
 * Ovide/Sgt. Floyd Pepper: You think we should've rented a bigger car?
 * Narrator: This Thanksgiving.
 * Yuckie Duck/Gonzo: [Scream] Ta-daaaaaaaaaaaa!
 * Narrator: There's no movie like a Children movie. Gary Imhoff, Jodi Benson, Orinoco the Womble, and Nellie the Elephant.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Ow, that hurt.
 * Narrator: The Childrens.

Trailer 2

 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: Wow, won't you look it at?
 * Goofy/Animal: Ah. Ha, ha, ha, ha.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog (offscreen): We are the Childrens---
 * Children/Muppet (Singing) Hello, hello, hello, hello.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog (offscreen): And these are our biggest fans.
 * Prince Cornelius/Gary: Yeah! Are you excited for our big trip to LA?
 * Thumbelina/Mary: I think there's somebody coming.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog (offscreen): Excuse me-- -Good grief.
 * Narrator: Disney and Sega presents.
 * Noah Parker/Walter: You guys are so talented.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear: Check it out: fart shoes!
 * [Fart Nosies]
 * Narrator: The biggest event in Hollywood history.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: The Muppets Spectacular! Yay!
 * Prince Cornelius/Gary: That is awesome!
 * Narrator There is just one problem.
 * Snow White/Veronica: I'm going to shoot straight. You guys aren't famous anymore.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear: Yeesh! I wish she'd shot a little more curvy!
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: Let's just start at the bottom and work our way back up to the top.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Can't you see I'm busy?
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: Come on guys, let's go!
 * Narrator: Step one.
 * Link/Boy 1: Are you one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: Yes, I am.
 * Narrator: Tour the world.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear: We should travel by map.
 * Prince Cornelius/Gary and Children/Muppet: To Paris!
 * [Gasping]
 * Narrator: Step two. Rehearse the show.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: I'm doing a duet with my new dance partner.
 * Pingu/Pepe: Hola.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy (offscreen): Let's try that lift again, shall we?
 * Pingu/Pepe: Oi, that lift again. Ok. On my count this time, Ok? In three, two--
 * [Crash]
 * Narrator: Step-- uh-- final.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: I believe in you, and you, and you, and well, all of you!
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: -Aw.
 * Orinoco/Kermit the Frog: -And now, singing chickens.
 * [Clucking song]
 * Narrator: Make the most sensitive,
 * [Explosion]
 * Narrator: distinguished,
 * Yuckie Duck/Gonzo: Prepare yourselves for head bowling!
 * Atomic Roger/Jack Black: What? I have not signed off on this!
 * Narrator: celebrity filled,
 * Pizza Boy/Man: Phenomena.
 * Narrator: and sophisticated Children movie ever made,
 * Noah Parker/Walter: Ah!
 * Narrator: Ever.
 * Yuckie Duck/The Great Gonzo: Have a seat.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear: Thank you!
 * Thumbelina/Mary: I think I'll stand.
 * Berk/Fozzie Bear (offscreen): Comfy.
 * Narrator: This Thanksgiving,
 * Sparky/Statler: Is this movie in 3D?
 * Robot X-5/Waldorf: Nope. The Childrens are as one dimensional as they've always been.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Hey! Watch it!
 * Narrator: Gary Imhoff, Jodi Benson, Orinoco the Womble, Nellie the Elephant, and introducing the newest children, Noah Parker.
 * Noah Parker/Walter: (screaming)
 * Narrator: And the Cartoon Animated.
 * Bongo/Kermoot: Heh, heh.
 * Matilda/Miss Poogy: (snort)
 * Foofur/Foozie: Watka, watka.
 * Matilda/Miss Poogy: You've been replaced.
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Oh yeah? What's that over there?
 * Matilda/Miss Poggy: Oh, what?
 * Nellie the Elephant/Miss Piggy: Hi-yah!
 * Narrator: The Childrens.
 * Goofy/Animal: See movie! See movie!
 * [Clucking]